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Sunday, June 28, 2015

Beginning at the End

   
   Life is replete with beginnings and endings and we must accept the truth of the fact that life is a series of constant changes…..some great, others…not so much. I have spoken many times (well….maybe just a few) about relationships, dating, and the chasm that seems to separate men from understanding women. Very rarely have I concentrated on the less pleasant aspect of a couple’s experience….separation (or divorce for those that are married).

  
   I knew a few friends growing up that had to deal with parents no longer willing to stay together, and I know that it is very hard for a child. Heck…it’s hard for the parents as well. As tough as it is and can be, the fact remains that such an ending is a beginning to something else…as most everything else in life.

  
   Life is often romanticized with little regard given to the reality of it. Children (those not touched by realities such as the one mentioned above) grow up with this idea that adulthood will lead to getting married, having children (and possibly a pet), and living in a big house with a picket fence. That sounds nice….but there are so many variables in that pristine picture that it’s almost not worth painting it in the first place.

   Not everyone can find that perfect person or cultivate the ultimate relationship with a soul mate…and must plod along through life making mistakes and learning from them, in a series of beginnings and endings. The idea that an ending is a bad thing is entirely dependent on what exactly is ending.

   There is a societal view that the ending of a relationship is a bad thing, but try telling that to a person that knew nothing but happiness when such an event occurred. It’s the same with divorce (and rightly so most of the time) but again, try passing that off as truth to someone grateful to be able to start again, free of the burden of a realized mistake.

  
   Divorce seems to carry a stigma of negativity that overshadows the reality of it’s occurrence. Society seems to be slow in accepting that this, like any other reality of life, will never go away and will always be a part of our humanity. The focus is always on the ending…and hardly ever on the beginning that ending creates.

  

   
   Now there is a progressive approach to the subject with the creation of a site (Divoree) that actually promotes the idea that if it has to be done, then it should be done in a way that is more efficient and cost effective. A novel idea…completely in step with the forward growth society has recently embraced.

   Also…it’s worth mentioning that people often find themselves in situations that are very detrimental to them, either from physical or mental abuse, with no financial recourse to free themselves to continue their growth. 

   With so many people touched by this unpleasant reality….why not support someone else in realizing that you can begin…at the end? 

People helping people is a good thing.








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